First draft "Social media has too much power"
Social media like; Internet and
television influence to people’s behavior, ideology, culture and politics. It
is because nowadays, they have many spectators, large part of the population
has a TV, computer or smartphone in their house, which makes it easy to create
a trend in the society. Some people say that they had not been influenced by
social media. Some people say that they have changed their opinion once or
twice because of the social media. Internet and television should be limited
because the society has to be critical themselves and not be influenced by
status quo, to think and to do what they want. Social media want to turn into a
new hegemony for this generation.
Firstly, everyone should be a
critical thinker which means that you are able to analyze and evaluate of an
issue in order to form a judgement. Why? Because your opinion has
an influent and it can be important, as for you as for those
around you.
Internet, television,
smartphones had been increasing as a technology that is easy to get, until the
point that almost every single person in the world has one or, has access to
them. According to a study carried out in 2013 by Tom Butts, 55% of the world's
households have digital television. Some people say that they do not believe at
all in what they see on Internet or television, it is because most of the cases
what they transmit is controlled and manipulated by people or private companies
that only want their own benefit. Worst of all, people who do not have a
critical mind will believe it. Then, it is the easy way to influence and
control the behavior of people, better call a hegemony.
Dear student,
ResponderEliminarI strongly recommend you to re-write an introduction with a clear thesis statement. So far, I see certain terms initially included in that paragraph with some of the reasons why you believe "social media" has influenced the way people think, do, and act. A stronger idea should lead your paper.
In addition to this, the second paragraph starts with an idea which is different from what you state in your introduction. Keeping a coherent order in your paper is always necessary. It is also worth mentioning that the arguments you display throughout your essay need to have supporting sources of information. You are making reference to a study in this paragraph, but it has not been appropriately cited. Check out the following links for you to get further info on how to use APA in your paper.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pdAfIqRt60c&list=PL8F43A67F38DE3D5D
https://owl.purdue.edu/owl/research_and_citation/apa_style/apa_formatting_and_style_guide/general_format.html
Last but not least, this two-paragraph version of your paper does not represent a well-written first draft. Please, take more time to nurture it and work hard to write it accordingly.
Best regards,
Jhon Losada